Recently, I have been studying a book called “For Women Only: What you need to know about the inner lives of men” by Shaunti Feldhahn. (The copy I have also includes the discussion guide for the book as well and you may see me reference that on occasion as well.)This book is all about what every woman needs to know about the inner lives of men. Now, when I picked up the book, I was actually looking at it to see how I could make fun of it for the silly title expecting it to be some piece of completely laugh-worthy feminist propaganda. After all, what the hell does a woman know about the inner workings of men? Her answer: Not much. but that does not mean a woman shouldn’t make an effort to try to understand the inner workings of her man and other men in general.
What I immediately liked about this book is that it is not only practical and easy to read, but she actually researched the topic with hundreds of personal interviews and broad spectrum surveys including men of all ages and walks of life. These interviews and surveys provide significant evidence to the points she makes in her writing, suddenly making it a somewhat credible and reliable book.
The truth is, our world is confused on gender roles and what every person male and female needs in a relationship. Contrary to much of the feminist propaganda of recent times, man and women are not the same. It is very important that a woman considers her role in a relationship as mutual and includes supporting and encouraging her man every day. This is a two-way road however and it should also be noted that it is also every man’s responsibility to support and encourage his woman as well. It seems that anymore, the key components to building and maintaining a happy and healthy relationship have been forgotten as they are not considered to be “progressive” enough by a number of influential people. It is my belief that this is also the cause of the rise in the divorce rate. These same progressive ideals that turn us away from a relationship building mentality, also teach us to watch out for “number one” above all others. it is because of this fact and a lack of healthy examples for the younger generations to see that some of the most basic relationship skills have been lost and are no longer passed from generation to generation.
So does this mean that I think we should go back to some kind of archaic thought process and social system where women stay at home and remain solely subservient to their men? No! If some woman decides she wants to be a lawyer or a doctor, then by all means she should be able to do and do that if she so chooses to. I just believe that if she would like to have a happy and healthy relationship, she should recognize the very basic internal and emotional needs for her man and make every effort to provide for those specific needs before moving forward with her own agendas or (God forbid) insisting that he give up on those needs in order to be with her.
So, Over the next few weeks (or however long this takes), I will be going over many of the key points in Feldhahn’s book, and answering a number of questions from the discussion guide (which just happened to be included at the back of my copy of the book). If you (like me) care about your man and want to understand him just a little bit better, I highly recommend checking out this book.
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this blog do not necessarily reflect the opinions of any individual other than that of the author of this blog. Shaunti Feldhahn is in no way affiliated with this blog and is only referenced as the respected author of “For Women Only: What you need to know about the inner lives of men” and “For Women Only: Discussion Guide.” If you find these posts interesting, please show her the respect of purchasing and reading her books so that you may grow yourself.